Monday, December 1, 1997
Racial reconciliation has become a popular theme in recent times. Of course, I’m for it. However, one must remember, people will not reconcile with one another until they are individually reconciled with God. A good old fashioned “when I die I’m going to heaven” salvation experience is still in order for all races.
Tuesday, December 2, 1997
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift… a precious gift from God!
Wednesday, December 3, 1997
“You can no more become a Christian by going to church than you can become an automobile by sleeping in your garage”
-Garrison Keillor
Thursday, December 4, 1997
One of the greatest ways we can show our love for God is… by resisting temptation.
Friday, December 5, 1997
Jesus is real. Our life is about how real we are with Him.
-Contributed by Martin Wishnatsky
Friday’s Funny…
“There was a game show contestant who won a significant amount of cash and prizes. All he had to do to collect his winnings was return to the game show the following day, and answer one brief question. The contestant was eager to collect his winnings, yet nervous as to how hard the question would be. The game show host approached the contestant with the question “Name two of Santa’s reindeer.” The entire crowd sighed a sigh of relief, even the contestant showed great confidence. Finally, the answer came…… “Rudolf and Olive.”
The crowd moaned and groaned with the stupidity of the response. After the shock wore off, the game show host said, “I can understand why you said ‘Rudolf,’ but where did you get the name ‘Olive?'”
The disappointed contestant said, “Well you know…… Rudolf, the red nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose…..and if you ever saw him, you would even say it glows! Olive, the other reindeer…..”
-Contributed by Connie Schaefer
Saturday, December 6, 1997
I have often said that people don’t like the word tithing so in the churches that I have pastored… we changed it to tiiiiiiithing and nobody seemed to mind. Seriously, if people are being blessed, giving is a non-issue. So, then what is the issue? IF PEOPLE ARE BEING BLESSED BY THE CHURCH!
Pastors, I pray that you will be a blessing to your congregation this Sunday.
Sunday, December 7, 1997
Our driveway is gravel and is .4 of a mile long. It would seem that the more you drive on it the smoother it would become. Just the opposite is true. The more you drive on it and the faster you drive the rougher it becomes. Periodically we have to bring in a tractor with a blade and smooth out the driveway so we can continue smooth passage.
That’s kind of the way the road of life is. Just because we have traveled it extensively and at rapid speed does not mean it gets smoother or stays smooth. It seems that one of the values of going to church on Sundays for us is to help grade (smoothen) the road of life.
For most… daily grading is essential. Perhaps we should call them ‘essentials’ instead ‘devotions
Monday, December 8, 1997
The road to spiritual maturity is always under construction.
Tuesday, December 9, 1997
In the modern church there seems to be a lot of emphasis on vision. I seriously doubt that any vision of the church will be empowered on high unless we quit trying to see with our eyes and begin to see with our hearts.
Wednesday, December 10, 1997
In the complexity of this day of modern technology, aren’t you glad that we don’t have to turn on any buttons, know any codes or commands to pray? We don’t even need a password to talk to God!
This form will help you appreciate the simplicity of the gospel.
Computer Problem Report Form
1. Describe your problem:
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
2. Now, describe the problem accurately:
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:
________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________
4. Problem Severity:
A. Minor__
B. Minor__
C. Minor__
D. Trivial__
5. Nature of the problem:
A. Locked Up__
B. Frozen__
C. Hung__
D. Strange Smell__
6. Is your computer plugged in? Yes__ No__
7. Is it turned on? Yes__ No__
8. Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes__ No__
9. Have you made it worse? Yes__
10. Have you had “a friend” who “Knows all about computers” try to fix
it for you? Yes__ No__
11. Did they make it even worse? Yes__
12. Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__
13. Are you sure you’ve read the manual? Maybe__ No__
14. Are you absolutely certain you’ve read the manual? No__
15. If you read the manual, do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__
16. If ‘Yes’ then explain why you can’t fix the problem yourself.
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
17. What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem
occurred?
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
l8. If you answered ‘nothing’ then explain why you were logged in?
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
l9. Are you sure you aren’t imagining the problem? Yes__ No__
20. Does the clock on your home VCR blink 12:00? Yes__ What’s a VCR?__
21. Do you have a copy of ‘PCs for Dummies’? Yes__ No__
22. Do you have any independent witnesses to the problem? Yes__ No__
23. Do you have any electronics products that DO work? Yes__ No__
24. Is there anyone else you could blame this problem on? Yes__ No__
25. Have you given the machine a good whack on the top? Yes__ No__
26. Is the machine on fire? Yes__ Not Yet__
27. Can you do something else instead of bothering me? Yes__
-Form submitted by Pastor Don Leigh of the Frederic Evangelical Free Church, Frederic, WI
Thursday, December 11, 1997
An old settler once said: “Dig the well before you need the water!” Unfortunately, too many Christians wait to dig their spiritual well until they are desperately thirsty.
Friday, December 12, 1997
I’ve noticed that dogs who are chained usually wear out the grass at the end of the chain. Christians often practice the same… living at the outer limits. Too few practice living in the center of God’s will.
Friday’s Funny…
Jimmy’s Sunday School teacher asked him if he ever studied the Bible.
“Yes, Ma’am,” he replied.
“then of course you have read the parables?”
“Yes, Ma’am.” he relied.
“Good,” said the teacher.And will you tell me which parable you like the best?”
“I like the one where everybody loaves and fishes.”
Saturday, December 13, 1997
In this cyber-ultra-fantastica day of communication and automated phone answering systems, isn’t it great that we can still talk to God one on one without listening to a message telling us what button to push for which problem or request. Thanks God… cause you know those machines drive me crazy!
Sunday, December 14, 1997
There once was a group of Tippy-toe Christians who attended a Tippy-toe church. Nobody knew it existed!
There once was a group of vocal, judgmental Christians who attended a vocal, judgmental church! Everyone wish they didn’t exist!
There once was a group of humble, repentant Christians who attended a friendly, caring church… and God’s love existed!
Remember to take time to fellowship with one another.
Monday, December 15, 1997
Great days are not measured by sunshine.
Great days are measured by SON LIGHT!
Wednesday, December 17, 1997
Jesus is as real today as yesterday and will be equally real tomorrow as he has always been. Jesus Christ, the same, yesterday, today and forever.
-Contributed by Martin Wishnatsky, Legal Assistant from Fargo, ND. A wonderful brother in the Lord.
Thursday, December 18, 1997
Not everything new is true.
Not everything old is outmoded.
That which is eternal is unaffected by the passage of time.
-contributed by Martin Wishnatsky
Friday, December 19, 1997
My home office window overlooks a creek that flows behind our house. There are no canoes, no speed boats, or other disruptions by man. In fact, there isn’t much of anything outside of nature that so much as disturbs a leaf by that creek. It’s so beautiful regardless of the season… just the way God made it.
So often people find it difficult to find God’s beauty in themselves and in others. There is something beautiful about people. Different like snowflakes. Just the way God us!
Friday Funny
Seen on a bumper sticker: “I took an IQ test and the results were negative.”
Saturday , December 20, 1997
Laughter is a wonderful thing. It seems to do wonders for the ability to cope and lightens the burdens of day to day life. Interestingly enough, some of the past two generations most famous comedians had horrendous personal lives, ending in premature death due to lifestyle and/or drug use. Why is it that so many of those who make us laugh the most find such little sense of humor in their own lives. I guess things aren’t so funny after all.
No matter who you are, what you are, or where you are… there is an empty area in our lives that we have a tendency to try to fill with almost anything from work, sex, or fishing that is reserved for GOD ONLY!
FILL MY CUP LORD!
Sunday, December 21, 1997
“Holy ground is not where Jesus walked in Palestine, but where Jesus walks now with our feet in service to Him.”
Tom White
Missionary to Cuba
Monday, December 22, 1997
As a little boy, I enjoyed a lot of gifts at Christmas. But none of them compared to what I saw when I looked into the heavens and saw the sun, moon, stars. It seemed to be an everyday gift of the greatness of the one whose birth we celebrate.
To me, it brings peace to know that by faith I live in the hand of the creator of the universe. AND HE LOVES ME.
Wednesday, December 24, 1997
The Johnson Family has been celebrating Christmas Eve with prayer, dinner, a program including musical numbers or contribution by each family segment, a reading of the Christmas story, opening of gifts (some have been memorable), and family caroling for at least 75 years that I am aware of… perhaps even longer.
I have noticed that gift giving has always been modest. No trying to impress… it’s the bond of Christ and family love that makes this special.
My prayer for you this Christmas is that you will have the joy of Him who is the giver of life, the ordainer of the family, and the reason for this season… Christ our Lord.
Saturday, December 27, 1997
Is Hinckley easier to find than Heaven?
Driving North of the Twin Cities on I-35 there is numerous billboards about Hinckley, MN. They tell you what you’ll find when you get there. Many of them are about the casino. Others have piggy backed on the casino popularity and have billboards for their businesses as well. Some are lighted. 100 years ago it was easy to get lost on the way to Hinckley. Not too many people get lost on the way to Hinckley anymore.
There has never been more signs and technology available to direct people to eternity and yet there sure seems to be a lot who get lost along the way. I suppose it’s because Christians are the billboards who landscape the highway to heaven. Unfortunately, the message is often ambiguous, the roadside is very dark and too many billboards (Christians) refuse to be turned on by the Light!
Sunday, December 28, 1997
“Holy ground is not where Jesus walked in Palestine, but where Jesus walks now with our feet in service to Him.”
Tom White
Missionary to Cuba
Monday, December 29, 1997
Spiritual growth is possible when we consider what we should be, recognize who we are, then focus on Him.
“Monday Morning Smile”
A local church deacon passed away and went to heaven. Arriving at the pearly gates, St. Peter said, “Come on in. I’ll show you around. You’ll like it here.”
Walking through the gates, the deacon noticed clocks everywhere. There were grandfather clocks, wall clocks, watches, and clocks in every corner. It appeared that heaven was nothing more than a giant clock warehouse.
Surprised at how heaven looked, the deacon asked, St. Peter, what’s the deal? Why are all these clocks here in heaven?”
St. Peter replied, “The clocks keep track of things on earth. There is one clock for each person. Every time the person on earth tells a lie, his clock moves one minute.”
“For instance, this clock is for Sam, the used car salesman. If you watch it closely, it will move.”
“Click.” The minute hand on Sam’s clock moved one minute. “Click.” It moved another minute. “Sam must be into closing a customer right now,” said St. Peter. “The minute hand on his clock moves all day.”
The deacon and St. Peter continued walking. Soon, they came to a clock with cobwebs on the minute hand. “Whose clock is this?” asked the distributor.
“That clock belongs to the Widow Mary. She is one of the finest, God-fearing, people on earth. I bet her clock hasn’t moved in a year or two.”
They continued walking and touring heaven. The distributor enjoyed watching the clocks of all his friends….. and the pastor. When the tour was finished, the deacon said, “I’ve seen everyone’s clock but Sleaze Shallowman’s. Where is his clock?”
Saint Peter smiled, “Just look up. We use his clock for a ceiling fan.”
Tuesday, December 30, 1997
We can learn from others:
I’ve learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sing “Silent Night.” Age 6
I’ve learned that you can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. Age 7
I’ve learned that when I wave to people in the country, they stop what they are doing and wave back. Age 9
I’ve learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes me clean it up. Age 13
I’ve learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up. Age 14
I’ve learned that although it’s hard to admit it, I’m secretly glad my parents are strict with me. Age 15
I’ve learned that silent company is often more healing than words of advice. Age 24
I’ve learned that brushing my child’s hair is one of life’s great pleasures. Age 26
I’ve learned that wherever I go, the world’s worst drivers have followed me there. Age 29
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it. Age 39
I’ve learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don’t know how to show it. Age 41
I’ve learned that you can make someone’s day by simply sending them a little card. Age 44
I’ve learned that the greater a person’s sense of guilt, the greater his need to cast blame on others. Age 46
I’ve learned that children and grandparents are natural allies. Age 47
I’ve learned that singing “Amazing Grace” can lift my spirits for hours. Age 49
I’ve learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone. Age 50
I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. Age 52
I’ve learned that keeping a vegetable garden is worth a medicine cabinet full of pills. Age 52
I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you miss them terribly after they die. Age 53
I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life. Age 58
I’ve learned that if you want to do something positive for your children, try to improve your marriage. Age 61
I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. Age 62
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back. Age 64
I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if you focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. Age 65
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually make the right decision. Age 66
I’ve learned that everyone can use a prayer. Age 72
I’ve learned that it pays to believe in miracles. And to tell the truth, I’ve seen several. Age 73
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. Age 82
I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch — holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. Age 85
I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. Age 92
-Contributed by Patrice Palmer
Wednesday, December 31, 1997… New Years Eve
This is the day of New Year’s Resolutions. I’ve heard a lot of them over the years. I liked this one: “I’m going to give more to the church this year than I give to the cable TV company!” I wonder what percentage of people who attend church would keep that resolution?
Last New Years Eve my mother was in the hospital. A victim of years of smoking. She was transferred to Mpls. by ambulance because, without the skill and equipment of a large hospital, she wouldn’t live the night. The new year was brought in with the doctor standing before me with the choice to put my mother on a ventilator or let her die within minutes. I decided to put her on the ventilator because they felt she had a 50% chance of getting off from it. Unfortunately, she wasn’t able to.
Seven days later she was removed from the ventilator and 10 days later she passed away.
We sang Hymns by her bedside every night in intensive care. There was a holy union taking place between life and death. The presence of the Lord was so great that I wanted to kneel and worship Him as I entered Intensive Care. It had become a sanctuary of the Most Holy.
God sent an angel to sing and pray for my mother on her death bed, Louis Palermo. I didn’t even know he was still alive. He and his brother Phil traveled around the world singing at Billy Graham crusades.
The doctors, nurses, and staff were deeply touched. I believe they were actually changed. They entered my mother’s room as if they too had been sent by God. Often they left in tears. Miraculously, almost all were believers and we prayed for them, they prayed for us, and I prayed for them.
They morning my mother passed away the nurse on duty, whose father was a pastor, stayed two hours late because she felt compelled to comfort her and us in those final moments.
There are many things I would have liked to have done with my mother. Of course the usual castle to live in, etc. Frankly, I have few regrets. However, things will never be the same. Standing by her grave is far different from sitting at her table.
So, if you really want to have great year and a resolution worth keeping, treat your mother as if this is the last year you will ever have with her on earth because… it may be!
If your mother is already gone, I know that you understand. Perhaps adopting a mother for the year might be a good thing!
Have a blessed New Year.
Lyn
